Staying Safe on Dating Apps
July 28, 2025
What are Dating Apps?
A dating app is an online service normally presented through a mobile phone that was made with the intention of connecting people virtually to create romantic relationships. These apps include but are not limited to Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, eHarmony, okCupid, Plenty of Fish, Happn, Coffee Meets Bagel, and Raya.
What exactly a user of these apps is looking for is entirely dependent on them, whether a friendship, casual partner, sexual “hook-up,” or long-term romantic relationship. Ultimately, these apps are simply an online platform for communication to take place and for these connections to be made.
Dating apps utilize a variety of tools to help users find a connection. These tools can include your general location, what radius you’re looking for a partner in (for example, people within 10 miles or maybe 80 miles away), what age range you want your connection to be in, your user profile, and an algorithm to put it all together.
The user profiles include pictures of yourself, your name, age, and optional information such as your political standing, interests/hobbies, relationship goals, religion, whether you drink or smoke, and more. Sometimes they make you select prompts that you write an answer for to help you catch the attention of others and create a conversation opener.
Some will preach about these apps, saying they’re a great place to meet a good person and make a strong bond, while others will scorn the platform, calling it a breeding ground for creeps and people just looking for a quick route to sex. Sometimes, two things can be true at once… this is one of those times.
Just like everyday in-person interactions, there is always the chance that a stranger you strike up a conversation with is a kind and respectful person, just as there’s always the chance that they’re a disrespectful, predatory weirdo. The reality is that with some people, they can seem like the first but end up being like the second.
This hidden persona can be difficult enough to spot in person. The virtual world only adds a greater layer of protection for people to hide their true qualities and intentions. That’s why it’s so important to prioritize your safety when participating in dating apps.
The Importance of Vigilance on Dating Apps
Just like in the physical world, there are many tips and tricks recommended for people to stay vigilant and keep themselves safe from danger when using online platforms like dating apps. For some, suspicion of online strangers is ever-present while for others it can feel easy to share personal information with a faceless stranger.
The idea of being able to tell someone your secrets or to talk about your life with someone who hasn’t actually met you can seem alluring. However, this can be incredibly dangerous.
While the internet is full of fun trends, videos, online shopping, music, and great platforms to talk with and play games with others, it is also full of online predators. These are individuals who use the internet to exploit and harm others. There are scammers and cybercriminals who will steal your identity and use your information to open bank accounts, apply for loans, or make purchases in your name. There is cyberbullying and harassment, as well as sexual exploitation.
Now, none of this is meant to scare anyone off of the internet or dating apps! This information is simply meant to bring awareness to serious issues and the to danger that can exist when using online services.
The intention of this blog is to simply encourage you to be mindful of what you say when online dating—not to avoid saying anything at all. Don’t be afraid to use these apps to connect with people, especially if you live in an area or have a lifestyle that makes it hard to meet new connections in other settings (I myself met my current boyfriend on the dating app Bumble)!
Ultimately, dating apps can be an amazing way to bring people together and create connections with those who you may never have been able to meet otherwise. That is why these helpful tips and tricks are here, to provide you with the tools to make the best and safest choices while still having fun and living your life!
How to Stay Safe on Dating Apps
Here are some of the best things to keep in mind when creating your profile and starting conversations on dating apps. These simple guidelines can help you stay safe, make genuine connections, and feel more confident as you navigate the online dating world.
Protect your information
One trick to keeping as much of yourself private as possible is to avoid linking your other social media accounts, which could have information that you did not share on the dating app and that could be used against you. If you feel that your social media accounts are safe from revealing private information, then you obviously have the freedom to do so. However, it’s advisable not to share your full name, workplace, home address, or a specific location in your profile.
Furthermore, be careful about sharing details of your daily routine, as this can reveal your specific location. Avoid being super specific. For example: “I go to Planet Fitness every Monday at 8 a.m. before going to the Thai Villa restaurant next door.” You never know who’s out there or who might try to find you at those exact locations without your knowledge or permission.
Be cautious with photos
It’s normal, and even recommended to some degree, to want to use the most fun and attractive photos of yourself that reveal key aspects of your personality and how you want to be presented! However, make sure to check over your photos before posting them online. You wouldn’t want to accidentally reveal identifiable landmarks or personal information.
For example, this can include a picture of you outside, excited about moving into your new apartment, and the sign with the apartment building’s name is visible behind you. Or, you may be posting yourself “On a morning walk!” and the signs to your left reveal what street you’re on.
Verify identities
If you’ve been talking to someone for a while through a dating app and you’re ready to take the next step in communication, consider video chatting or having a phone call before meeting in person. This will help you get a better sense of the other person and a video chat, specifically, can confirm whether their pictures match their real face.
Research your match
Another great way to verify the identity of your match is to conduct a little online research. It may seem like “stalking,” but it’s a valid way to ensure your own safety just by looking through what they have posted publicly. You’d want to know if your date is going to pop up with some mugshots!
Look into their online presence on social media platforms to see if their details match up with what they put on their profile and shared with you. Lying is heavily suspicious behavior… and it’s just a bad quality to have in a romantic partner in general.
Set boundaries
Determine what you’re okay with and what you’re not okay with before getting too deep into connections, that way it’s harder for someone to push at your boundaries. Establish your comfort level with sharing information, as well as your timing about when you want to meet. Hold true to yourself and be assertive in protecting your boundaries.
Don’t send money
It’s generally a wise decision, whether on a dating app or not, to never send money to someone you’ve met online. This is especially true if you have never even met them in person. This is an easy way to get scammed and, in some cases, can lead to identity theft.
Stay on the platform
It’s recommended to keep your communication with a fresh match within the dating app or website initially, rather than immediately exchanging personal contact information. It’s a lot easier to report suspicious behavior or to shut down a connection gone sour over the dating apps (which normally have an easy tool for blocking or un-doing a connection). Sharing personal contact information can leave you vulnerable to scams and identity theft as well.
Report suspicious behavior
Like I said, it’s pretty easy to block and report matches on the app you found them on. If you’re experiencing any sort of suspicious, unsettling, or outright harassing or violent behavior, immediately report it through the app. This includes requests for money or donations, underage users, fraudulent profiles, and spam or solicitation. User profiles can also reveal suspicious behavior, so keep a lookout for any strange signs that could point to a scam or predatory behavior.
What To Do During the Date
Say you’ve matched with someone on a dating app. You’ve been talking for a while, sending messages back and forth and things are going well. You have similar interests, maybe you’ve laughed a few times or found yourself smiling at your phone, and now you’re feeling ready to meet in person. This is the exciting next step!
While you should definitely see it as a fun and happy moment, you should also continue to follow the proper steps to stay safe. This is the situation where things can get more serious, for better or for worse. Below are some tips and tricks for when you’re finally setting a meet-up.
Meet in public
Avoid choosing or agreeing to a date spot that is isolated from others, such as your date’s house/apartment or the woods. Always choose a public, populated place where others can see you in case something were to go wrong. Great spots for first dates include coffee shops, restaurants, malls, arcades, museums, or mini golf parks.
Control your transportation
Ensure that you’re not relying on your match for a ride to the date. This can put you in a dangerous situation or simply cause you discomfort if the date is going sour and you wish to leave but have to use them to get home.
In some situations, an insolent date could take your desire to go home as a hit to their ego or a sign of you being “rude” and refuse to give you a ride back. In the worst situations, mugging or kidnapping could take place. Arrange your own transportation so you can leave whenever you want and feel a greater sense of safety.
Inform someone
Before you leave for your date, make sure to tell a friend or family member about your plans. This includes who you’re meeting and where you're going. Share a picture of your match and their name with your trusted individual.
This is what I did when meeting my (now boyfriend) for the first time. I texted my two best friends a picture of him, his full name, and Instagram profile. Both of these friends already had my live location shared with them, but if you don’t have your location shared with your chosen trusted individual then go ahead and share it, even if it’s just for the span of your date.
It’s generally a good idea to have at least one person in your life who has your location at all times, for safety reasons. Some people may even set a “check in on me after X amount of time” set with the person they chose to tell about the date. All of this can help you stay safe in an unknown situation.
Watch your drink
This is important in general, but especially when on a date for the first time. A trip to the bathroom can give a dangerous date the opportunity to slip something into your drink.
Don’t be embarrassed to take your drink with you to the bathroom and set it on the sink or to ask for a new drink after you return from the bathroom. Remember, your safety is always the number one priority.
Trust your instincts
Listen to your body - it has a surprising knack for knowing something may be wrong. There is a certain level of anxiety that is natural for every first date, but if something feels off or unsafe do not hesitate to end the date and leave.
Don’t let others telling you to “chill out,” “get over it,” or “just relax and have fun” sway you from the feeling that something is wrong. Be aware of your surroundings and determine if anything feels off or dangerous to you.
Have an exit plan
Make sure that you have a plan on how to end the date and leave early if needed. This can include a friend or family member that is available to pick you up if you've had too many drinks or something goes wrong with your transportation method. A classic and good method is to have a friend ready to call you after you text them. It’s smart to have discussed this beforehand so your friend is prepared for a text or call to come in from you and is able to respond quickly.
I’ve had to use this method in college when a date was trying to convince me to go back to his place and wasn’t easily accepting my no. I excused myself to use the bathroom and texted my friends to call me in 5 minutes with some frantic reasoning that I had to leave. It worked and I was able to safely get home.
Remember…Stay Safe but Have Fun!
I’d like to reiterate once more that none of this is meant to frighten anyone away from the internet or dating apps, and is not a reason to never meet anyone in person that you met online. It’s simply how you go about these interactions that matters for your personal safety and enjoyment.
A little nervousness and awkwardness can be expected from any first date, but you never want to feel unsafe or uncomfortable. This is an exciting moment, so control what you can to ensure you’re as safe as you can be… and have fun!
References:
https://rainn.org/articles/tips-safer-online-dating-and-dating-app-use
https://extension.okstate.edu/fact-sheets/dating-for-online-beginners-tips-for-staying-safe.html
